It’s been a tough week. Rough enough to distract me from the eternal joy I have in Christ. I’m fighting a chronic disease called Cryoglobulinemia; which is a form of vasculitis (inflammation of the blood vessels) that goes in and out of remission. It’s been out of remission since about January and it takes time to chemically knock it back in its place. It can and does affect every bodily system by cutting off blood flow. Inflamed blood-vessels can also break and this week, I’ve had problems with profuse bleeding. I’m past the worst of it, I think, but bleeding is scary and the experience has left me drained. Sometimes, I’m tired of fighting it. I’m not suicidal but some days, I long for home.
I and the people of my community are also the victims of an environmental disaster; caused by the mismanagement of the EPA of a Super Fund project involving an old mine at the headwaters of the Animas River in Colorado. I live downstream in New Mexico and the Animas River Valley is my home. I love this river and it is the source of life of all living in the desert I call home. The once sparkling clear water is now flowing, thick, yellow mud containing high concentrations of heavy metals. Heavy metals sink and the Animas may never be the same. My beautiful river turned poison, fills me with sadness and concern for all the people and animals that depend on the Animas for sustenance. Though I am a joyful woman, I can’t help but mourn.
If my reality was the horizontal view of life only, I would give up right now. If I didn’t have Jesus, God’s Heavenly perspective, and the spiritual fruits my faith in Jesus has produced, I would at the least, be bitter, fearful, and angry; but my faith tells me to look up. Neither disease nor disaster can take away the eternal hope I have in Jesus and the new world to come. I have joy to help me endure and a doctor with a sure cure to restore my physical health and also, the health of my beloved river. The blood I shed in sickness, may take my physical life but the blood Jesus shed for me made my spirit and soul eternal. If Jesus chooses to heal me now, it will be for His glory and my temporary gain. I know I will be completely healed when His Kingdom rule begins and I will never have to face death again. I will receive a new glorified body and never re-experience the pain and destruction of disease. God will also, heal His beautiful creation and my beloved Animas will glitter and sparkle with new life that will never cease. All things destroyed by human sin restored as a dysfunctional world is healed and returns to full function, according to God’s design.
By my faith in God through Jesus, I am refreshed and ready to live out the full number of days my Father has given me. My spirit and soul nourished by all the spiritual fruits are replenished. With tested faith found true and hope, I joyfully look forward to full health in a vibrantly healthy world. I rest secure in the promises earned by the One whose body was broken and His blood, shed for me.
joyindestructible 
This sounds tough. More strength to you.
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Thank you, Jacqueline. It’s good to have support.:0)
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Hang in there, my friend. One day you and I will be having a face to face in heaven and, instead of reflecting on all the wrong, will be rejoicing at all that is right.
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My prayers are for you but your outlook is inspiring. Shalom.
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Thank you for your prayers Jacob and the wonderful poem that helped me get through an otherwise, hard week. I think I’m past the worst of this crisis so, maybe cryo will be satisfied and let me be for awhile! I covet those prayers.
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Hi Patrick, I finally figured out how to retrieve you comment.:0)Thank you for your support.
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It seems symptomatic, you have type II? I can’t imagine this suffering. I’ve been reading on it a bit. On how blood proteins clump below 37 Celsius. I hear Turmeric works wonder as an anti-inflammatory, me and my friend drunk it 1/4 tsp with hot milk, guaranteed to set you straight. It did her. Ginger cut in chunks work great, too, I’ve seen it myself, has a warming effect. My step father had extreme cold chills due to sudden fever, I put ginger in his mouth in less than 5 minutes he was joyful again as if nothing ever happened. With GOD all things are possible. Regardless, your testimony is one that inspires love for GOD, a prevailing hope. Don’t give up. You can’t leave because then I’d have to pack my bags, too and “it’s too early in the morning for killing princes.”-Troy (Brad Pit)
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Thank you, Michael. I do use natural things and though I haven’t tried the turmeric, I do use cider vinegar. I mix it with water and stevia and it tastes like lemonade. I also, soak in it and apply it directly to inflamed areas. It does help but I’m in a pretty intense flare. Stress is the major culprit in autoimmune disorders and I’ve had a ton of it the last few years. Don’t worry though, I won’t give up. I’m fighting back and reaching for life. My little grandsons need me.:0) You are a blessing, Michael. You encourage and edify me in so many ways. Whatever happens, I know someday, we’ll rise together and meet Jesus in the air!
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I forgot to answer your question…I don’t know if I have type 2 or 3. Testing is difficult because the blood has to be kept warm so, sending it far away to a lab is often, a waste. Knowing the type makes no difference in treatment, which consists of suppressing the immune system and controlling the inflammation. It’s so rare that I’m blessed to have a diagnosis sat this stage. Many people loose a limb or experience kidney failure before they know what is wrong. God is good to me.
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I know what you mean. I was also diagnosed with autoimmune disorder by my dermatologist that attacked my thyroid and causes me psoriasis. to me, food allergies and chronic stress are the triggers but since GOD has blessed me with peace I am prevailing over the side effects. Of course, you’re right, we could have it worse but that’s what makes us special.
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What’s the name of your disorder? Cryo and interferon damaged my thyroid too. About a year ago, I started taking the old fashioned natural thyroid hormone supplement and my thyroid is functioning much better. Sometimes, I think it is synthetic chemicals that are the root of autoimmune diseases.
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I was running behind reading this week, sorry you had a bad week. Blessed are those who suffer in His name
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Thank you, Robert. I’m doing better. My poor river is still sick but hopefully, God will have mercy and restore it too. Life stinks sometimes, but God is always good.
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Wow such an important read for us all, I have been engrossed in writing keeping my thoughts busy. I need to try and do some reading, your post is so important to us all. We often see movies or documentaries on damaged rivers and how soils are damaged by toxic waste. The big one here in Australia is the damage to the River Murray., God opened the river 4yrs ago after it nearly dying.
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Hi bjs, The Animas is still sick, though the mustard-yellow eighty mile long plume has passed. Irrigation is cut off, wells are contaminated. Crops, wildlife, and livestock are suffering. There is an alternative water source for those on city water but it is going to be expensive to re-route it here. The river is our life-line here…I really can’t fully express how it feels…but I’m praying that God will restore her and I know He’s the only one who can. We’ve been having some good rain and I think that will help.
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